Did you wake up this morning wishing you were somewhere else? Knowing that ahead of you lay fear and dread. Were you scared about how long you took in the shower? Or whether you remembered to buy enough milk? Or maybe you are facing another day of being trapped inside the same four walls, not allowed to go out because you can't be trusted.
Narcissistic abuse wrecks lives. Every day you accept this behaviour you are not only damaging your own self esteem and self worth but also that of your children. They are learning how to behave from you and your partner. Do you really want them to grow up to have the same relationship as you are in right now? These patterns of behaviour (the rows, the violence, the control) are imprinting on yours and your children's brains. You are learning that this is normal.
But it isn't. You and they deserve to be treated with respect and love. Love doesn't scream in your face. Love doesn't slam you against a wall. Love doesn't tell you that no-one else would ever want you.
The Nurturing Coach is the only specialist in narcissistic abuse recovery in Lincoln
I care. And I am listening.
I have worked with hundreds of people who came to me feeling the same as you. Just about ready to give up. But together we built their confidence and developed strategies to help them break these patterns. To learn to love themselves enough to say "no more". And showed their children that they will not accept this for themselves and that the behaviour is wrong.
Abuse is not easy to break free from because often we believe all the cruel things they tell us about ourselves. We believe that no judge would give us access. That everyone thinks we are crazy. And that our children are better off without us.
But that simply isn't true. You have been abused and you CAN and WILL move on from this. You DO deserve better and your are a GREAT parent.
You can continue on as you are, each day the same as today. Slowly eating away at your confidence and your children's self esteem.
You can choose to do something for yourself and grab a free 1 hour session with Sarah where we will focus on the NUMBER ONE issue for you right now
"I would give the course 10/10. I felt that Sarah was very encouraging and non judgemental which makes it easier to those difficult questions .... I would recommend this course."
" Sarah is a wonderful person, who listens to your needs and knows just the right way to motivate you and coach you . I would definitely recommend that you have at least one coaching session with Sarah ..... " Sam (online client)
"You are mine. I own you. You will not do anything without my permission and if I suspect you are building confidence to act without my consent, I will tear you down until you realise that without me you are nothing. If you dare to leave, I will make it my lifelong mission to make you pay for disrespecting me. At first I will remind you of how wonderful things were at the start, how much I loved you and tell you that everything will be different if you just come home. Once you are here I will punish you. I will make sure you NEVER dare to leave ever again and if you do I will make you believe I will kill you. Our kids are simply weapons to be used by me to hurt you. When you or the kids cry, I know it means I am winning. You are mine"
The narcissist never said this but I know that it is what was going on in their head. And if you're here then you probably recognise the words yourself.
A narcissist came into my life 5 years ago and flipped it clean upside down. As a social worker I had witnessed abuse and the devastating impact it had on lives but to live it was/is completely different and I wasn't in the slightest bit prepared.
I was fortunate that in my situation I was able to put some distance between us but their behaviour impacted mine, and my families lives, on an almost daily basis. I was attacked, threatened, stalked and walked all over. It made me depressed, I put on weight and felt completely hopeless. Even worse it bought out a side of me that I didn't like - hate.
Hate is a draining and worthless emotion because it only ends up hurting you. I didn't like who I was becoming so I decided to take action. I diversified my training, read every article I could on narcissism and spoke to real life victims and survivors.
Recovering from abuse is a journey and one that I will always be on but I am getting back to the old me. The one who used to laugh and have fun. And now I want to help others on their journey.
I have particular expertise in preventing parental alienation, co-parenting with a narcissist and personal recovery including breaking the patterns of abuse using NLP, REBT and Life Coaching techniques.
Even if you're not quite ready for that and just want to chat, I am happy to listen so book yourself in for your free 1 hour Break Free session and you can share your hopes, fears and dreams in completely confidence with someone who understands.
Thank you for visiting my website and I really look forward to helping you on your journey to recovery